Summary
- Start here
- About the book
- Recommended approach to reading “how to listen” for book club leaders
- View by Week
You are here
About the book
the book cover
the title and the subtitle of the book are all in lower case – because speaking is uppercase, or capital letters, and listening is lower case.
Both upper case and lower case are required for written communication and when it comes to spoken communication, you need speaking and listening for effective communication. Each supports the other and neither will be effective alone.
Upper and lower case has traditions, syntax and rules and they help and support you until you master them.
Once mastered, you can choose or ignore the rules and traditions.
the background to the book
the process of creating the book
what others say about the book
what I have learned since listening to readers of the book
View by Week
| Week | Reading Chapters | Book Club discussion | Recommendations, Questions and Techniques to practice each week | Podcasts | Other resources |
| 00 | 01 – why listen
02 – get ready to listen |
The book club members will read the first two chapters to prepare for Week 01 | We recommend finding a workplace listening colleague or buddy—someone you know well and trust. They will remind, encourage, and stretch the way you practice your listening each week.
Thousands of examples from our research show that listeners who find a listening buddy at work will improve, maintain, and sustain their listening better than those who treat listening as a solo pursuit. If you buy them a copy of this book, you can help each other accelerate the listening in your workplace together. Who is the best listener you have ever seen? What is one thing they did well? When was the last time someone fully and deeply listened to you? What did they do well during that conversation? When you think of that conversation, how did you think, speak, and feel differently as a result |
053 – The Five Levels of Listening – Listening to Yourself (Part 1)
054 – The Five Levels of Listening – Listening to Yourself (Part 2) 060 A Masterclass in Level One Listening – Listening to yourself with Dr Romie Mushtaq 064 The Art of Focus and Listening – Lessons from world champion sniper Christina Bengtsson 067 Making a habit of Deep Listening with James Clear 074 Unlock the ancient secrets between listening and breathing with James Nestor |
how to listen – the most comprehensive book about listening in the workplace – visual edition
Listening Quiz – assess and understand your listening barriers The Ultimate Guide for Listening on a Zoom Video Conference – Host Version – Digital Edition |
| 01 | 03 – give and pay attention | 01 – why listen
02 – get ready to listen |
Choose a trusted work colleague to practice with. Ask them to notice and offer feedback about how you listen in discussions with them. Invite them to observe your listening when present in group meetings with you.
Before each conversation, create, integrate, and practice Who is the best listener you know at work? When you are in group meetings with them, become a listening detective and keep a journal of what you notice they do well as a listener. Don’t try to emulate it; just observe it in action. |
013 World-class educator John Corrigan explains how to help children learn to listen. Learn the impact of your listening effectiveness when you notice the familiar and the different
061 The myth of multi-tasking: working memory and listening with Professor Stefan van der Stigchel |
Hedy Lamarr, including Hedy’s backstory & The Complete History of Qualcomm
Jack Zenger, “Age, Gender, and Ability to Listen: Who Listens Best?” June 11, 2015 Uri Hasson, “This Is Your Brain on Communication,” TED Talk,February 2016. |
| 02 | hear, see and sense | 03 – give and pay attention | When your attention strays, reset your focus by checking the color of the speaker’s eyes. It’s a micro-reset of two to three seconds. A word of caution: extended eye-to-eye contact isn’t appropriate in all cultures.
Take a longer and deeper breath when your attention strays for an extended period. Notice the signals from your body about your attention. When you notice you are drifting or distracted, adjust the position of your spine, neck, or body. P.S. The difference between hearing and listening is action. How did you do with last week’s actions? Did you find a listening colleague at work to join on your ‘how to listen’ journey? |
036 How to listen like a High Court Judge with Justice Michael Kirby 056 The Five Levels of Listening – Listening to the Content 065 Listen like World Memory Champion Dr Boris Konrad 066 Listening to body language with Susan Constantine 070 Teaching the world to listen with Evelyn Glennie 125 the significant consequences when you can decode non-verbal cues |
Paul Ekman, “Universal Facial Expressions”
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| 03 | explore the backstory | hear, see, and sense | Adjust where you sit during group meetings. Experiment and sit in different locations during the week and notice how this influences your listening—whether face-to-face or via video conferencing.
In group meetings, keep a count of the number of times With your trusted workplace listening buddy, practice P.S. Thinking about the workplace listening colleague you chose in chapter 2, are you noticing more about how others are listening to you? Keep practicing with your workplace listening colleague— and remember: listening is a contact sport. |
042 How to listen across generations with Holly Ransom
076 Your listening is at best, a wonderful guess Tracey Thompson and Mark Bowden 095 Three practical ways to listen when you disagree fiercely – Simon Greer |
Don Van Natta, “Serena, Naomi Osaka and the Most Controversial US Open Final in History,” ESPN, August 17, 2019 |
| 04 | notice how it is said | explore the backstory | During a discussion with one other person, ask the speaker: “Do you mind taking me back to when you first noticed this?” (This is a great exercise to practice with your workplace listening partner.)
During a group meeting, ask the speaker the same question: “Do you mind taking me back to when you first noticed this?” In a group meeting, keep count of the number of times the P.S. When you are thinking about group meetings in which you could practice listening for the backstory, consider this for groups with projects or issues that are in the first third of their lifecycle, rather than something close to its conclusion.Select groups where you have existing relationships, rapport, and trust rather than ones in which you are establishing a relationship. |
005 Michael Henderson, Corporate Anthropologist, outlines why most employee engagement surveys are question-biased rather than listening-biased
123 the hidden clues when you listen well in low-trust group meetings |
Andrea Thompson, “Speed of Thought-to-Speech Traced in Brain,” Live Science, October 16, 2009
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| 05 | focus on what is unsaid | notice how it is said | Consider the list below and notice your own speaking preference first. Focus on one element of how you say it each day rather than identifying all three at once.
• Language: stories or statistics During a group meeting, choose one speaker you know well. Listen and notice how they explain a concept. Focus on one element of how they say it during a meeting. • Language (stories or statistics): count how many stories they use during the conversation compared to when they refer to evidence or data During a group meeting, choose an unfamiliar speaker. Listen and notice how they explain a concept. Focus on one element of how they say it during the meeting. • Language (stories or statistics): count how many stories they use during the conversation compared to when they refer to evidence or data • Preference (negative or positive): count how many times P.S. The difference between hearing and listening is action. How did you do with listening to the backstory with your workplace listening partner? |
028 Vanessa Oshima explains what market research can teach us about listening to customers
044 Why your doctor needs to listen deeply with Dr Danielle Ofri 091 Learn how to listen with the patience of a neuroscientist Dr Alison J. Barker |
058 The Five Levels of Listening – Listening for the Unsaid |
| 06 | listen for their meaning | focus on what is unsaid | During a discussion with one other person in one meeting each day, ask any of these questions:
During a discussion with one other person, pause longer than
P.S. The difference between hearing and listening is action. Are you noticing that these exercises are building on the foundation of the previous week? Did you notice whether there is a bias for stories or statistics in your organization during last week’s meetings? |
001 Jennifer MacLaughlin Auslan Interpreter for the deaf community 007 Listen like a mediator – World class mediator and author of 37 books on the topic of resolving conflict Ken Cloke explores the 5 levels of listening030 How radical listening created a global $175 million legacy – Kathy LeMay explores the impact of listening and not pitching in the not for profit sector is the difference between money and meaning049 Listen like FBI negotiator, Chris Voss111 how to effectively listen to what employees mean rather than what they say with Bryan Adams |
059 The Five Levels of Listening – Listening for Meaning |
| 07 | over to you | listen for their meaning | In a group meeting, count the number of times the speaker uses these phrases:
• “Actually. . .” Ask a trusted workplace colleague to spend five minutes explaining something they struggle with at work. At the end of the discussion, explain what you thought the essential issue was to them—what it truly meant. P.S. Practicing each week with these exercises will help you to develop more listening muscles. Each of the three tips to practice each week are simple. The effort is practicing. You can go back at any time and work with your workplace listening partner on each exercise, rather than only when you are reading this book. |
093 The power of listening and how it forever changed the life of Author Heather Morris
116 how to listen when you will never be able to fix it – Dr Kathryn Mannix |
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| 08 | Reflections, insights, and application | Listening is a contact sport, yet you can practice alone.
Reading this book is a way to practice safely. Your listening will progress in every discussion and meeting—it only takes a moment of conscious awareness and presence. When you bring a mindset of being open to having your mind changed, the seeds of listening will flourish. Listening is a sequence of moments, minutes, and meetings. Focus in the moment, and the entire conversation improves. When you focus on basics in the moment, your listening muscles strengthen and you can advance to higher levels of impact. Listening is a skill, a practice, and a strategy. Now it’s over to you. The next steps rely on you practicing and improving how to listen. |
127 Listening Masterclass – how to listen to what emerges in between – Part I of III 128 Listening Masterclass – how to listen to what emerges in between – Part II of III 129 Listening Masterclass – how to listen to what emerges in between – Part III of III |
how to listen course – fundamentals – workplace edition – Learn in a cohort. Join a community. Invest in your career – Join the waitlist.
how to listen – the most comprehensive book about listening in the workplace – visual edition Listening Quiz – assess and understand your listening barriers The Ultimate Guide for Listening on a Zoom Video Conference – Host Version – Digital Edition |
